1st day at work

it's my first day at work today after 1 wk's break in HK. can't help but compare the hols i had when i was in my previous firm and in my current job. when i was on hols previously, i wld be thinking of my work the whole time!i wld dream abt it, worried abt it, yaddah yaddah...this time round, i felt as if i was back in school where u get those long long carefree breaks..sigh..those gd old days.
first day at work and i'm unassigned!goodie!at least can lobo my monday blues away..but am i really happy at work these days?i ask myself this qn at least once a day!in the beginning, yes. happy to be knocking off when i can still see daylight and i need not cancel on my fren whenever there's a gathering. in the past, i jus dun have the mood to attend any form of gathering.all i wanted was to stone and not speak for a long long while, jus be anti-social u noe. i was snappish all the time, a hermit in my own room and a less than nice fren.all i cld think of was whether i can finish my work ontime, if there'll be any screw ups..etc

my current job may seem ideal, esp after leavin my previous i-dun-treat-my-employees- as -humans firm. i feel appreciated here, at least they seem concerned abt everyone's welfare!but i feel as if my brain cells are slowly but surely rotting away..nothing seems to be happening, my brains dun get taxed as much and adrenaline level at non-existent level! used to be i felt great when i can resolve something, felt some pervserse form of job-satisfaction when i managed to complete the job ontime without killing myself or my team.

these days, i dun feel rushed, no feeling of wow-i-know-wat-i'm-doing..hmmm.....sounds like i'm not real contented yah???hahaha..maybe...but no way will i go back to what i used to have. at least i get enuff sleep these days, temper gettin better and hopefully eyebags are disappearing fast!cld have been worse yah...:)